Parenting Grown Up Children – A Mum’s Story

I am Fiona, I am 60, married to Sam. We have two grownup children, Mark, who lives with his male partner and Matthew who is married to Rosie, they have two children, Daniel, 8 and Molly 5

My Problem. It seems Matthew has had an affair with a woman at work. My daughter-in-law rang us in great distress and told us all this. He’s now left the marital home supposedly to sort himself out.  I am desperately worried for them both, and especially the effect on our grandchildren.

How I understood my problem. I feel so very torn and upset by all this. I want to shake some sense into my son; I try to be reasonable but end up getting angry or upset. It’s driving a wedge between me and my husband. I have to understand that he sees things differently from me. I have to let Sam know that we must support all of them.
 
What I’m going to do to change things. We’ve offered to pay for a series of counselling sessions for them both. But Matthew says he’s not ready to do that, and can’t give the other woman up so easily.
Sam and I have decided to give them a bit of space to sort themselves out and to take the grandchildren out a bit more when we can. We will do our best to make sure that Matthew and Rosie know that we are there to support, not judge.

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