I am Laura - Conflict/In-laws
I am Laura
I'm a 34 year old Mum. My partner and I have a 3 year old son. My partner is 32.
His parents don’t like me. We struggle with this and I know that my partner feels he is trapped in the middle.
How I understood my problem
I asked my Mum how Dad’s parents were towards her when she got married and had me. She told me that they were “cold and not very nice at first”. She said that they were worried that she would take their son away from them. They told her some years later that he was a sensitive young man and they thought that she would not be as understanding as they were. My partner is an only child, so I wondered whether they thought I wasn’t good enough – I know I am - so I need to approach this carefully.
What I’m going to do to change things
I will talk to my partner about what my Mum said and discuss ways I can reassure his parents that I love and care for him. Maybe if I am more friendly and less guarded it will make a difference. When we see the “in-laws” perhaps we should show them how good we are together. I think it might help too, if they see what a good Mother I am to their grandson and if I shared him more with them, they might like that.